Chloe Womack - Helping Women, Become Their Dream Woman, By Loving Themselves 365
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I live In A Glass House, But I'm Willing to Share What I Know About Relationships! Part 3

6/22/2012

11 Comments

 
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The key here is SHARE your life not GIVE IT UP
    If this is your first time reading this blog, I suggest you go back and read part 1 & 2 first.


#3 Never lose yourself in another person.


     This can be tricky if you don’t know how to love yourself to begin with. Most people (not all) that lose themselves in a relationship do so because they are trying to get something from the other person in return; and nine times out of ten it’s not physical it’s emotional. Most people give what they want in return. Let me rephrase that. Most WOMEN give what they want in return and it’s nothing wrong with that.

    Problems come into play when you start giving to much of yourself. Most women give more of themselves than necessary. I’ve been there so let me explain further to give you that “AHA” moment. When you started the relationship you was focused and driven you were running every morning, praying noon and night, doing the things you enjoyed, focused on your career and goals, dedicating me time, going to bed on time and the list goes on and on. Then all of a sudden you met this man and you want to show him how interested you are, so every time he calls you answer, you cancel your normal appointments to spend time with him, you stay on the phone all night instead of getting the rest you need, your off time becomes his time and slowly but surely you start to lose yourself. What happen to the woman who use to enjoy doing things on her own, the woman who had a life outside of her mate, and the woman who knew to put God before any man?  What happen to “YOUR LIFE”?

      You became needy. I need to hear your voice; I need to be around you, I need you to make me happy, I need you to make me smile, I need you, I need you. To tell the truth you’re messing up the flow of things. You have to continue being who you are, because you’re giving off the wrong signals, because soon as the new relationship scent dies you’re complaining about why we don’t go anywhere, why you don’t call me like you use too, why, why, why.

     Now pay attention, the funny thing about men is, they will call you when their available and if they’re not they will let you know “I’ll call you back later”. If a man has plans nine times out of ten they will not cancel them to just chill. A man won’t stop taking his friends calls because you’re around. A man will not meet a woman and start immediately thinking about tomorrow, but most women have already started thinking about next year.

     This is where I have to agree with Steve Harvey “Think like a Man”. Continue to do what makes you happy and stop giving up who you are to please someone else, because most of the time they didn’t ask you too, you were already willing and able. Unfortunately, when he doesn't give up his life for you, you become angry and it's not fair.  You lost yourself in him, he didn’t lose himself in you.  Never lose yourself in ANOTHER.
 


     This is not a blog that I want you to carry in your mind like a guide to dating 101, this is just something for you to think about. If it speaks to you than I hope you receive it, if not then so be it ;). Not everything is for everybody.  Blog with me!!




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I live In A Glass House, But I'm Willing to Share What I Know About Relationships! Part 2

6/14/2012

16 Comments

 
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     Like I said previously “I live in a glasshouse”, but I will share what I have learned with anyone that is willing to listen. The second thing I have learned, is I had to make God my foundation and by doing so he has taught me some amazing things about myself that I didn't  know. No I’m not telling you to run out to your nearest church and everything will be alright, what I’m telling you, is get to know him personally. Get to know him on a one on one level. Get to know him “FOR YOURSELF”.  For me this meant forgetting everything I thought I knew about God and opening myself up to whatever it was that he was willing to teach and show me. I had to forget about all the Christians I came across that practiced hypocrisy and made me doubt him. I had to forget about everything the world told me about him and let him speak to me himself.

    What a lot of us think we know about God isn’t “God”, but the actions and words of people that call themselves saints (no disrespect). What we know is how so and so carry themselves in the name of religion. What we forget is people are people and their not God, so you have to get to know him for yourself and he will blow you away. He has opened up my mind and given me understanding of self that I couldn’t have achieved on my own. He has given me a complete new outlook on life.

    This is the key, once you get to know him he will introduce you to the real you. He will show you just how strong, wise and capable you are. He will teach you how a queen should be treated, he will teach you how to stop taking on the insecurities of others, he will teach you how to love someone, but not lose yourself in them, he will teach you how not to let others control your emotions. He will teach you how to be a woman and how to give yourself the love that you crave from others. He will show you that he’s GOT THIS and always have, but you never showed faith and let him handle the situation. When we don't have God in our lives we tend to try to fix everything the best way we can instead of leaving it alone and remaining focused on what really requires our attention. Fixing others is not our job, we can help by being the best that we can be, but let God do the fixing.

     This is why it’s so important to get to know him, because relationships can be tricky and when you’re dealing with the needs of another you have to realize what’s your responsibility and what’s not. Every problem is not yours, most problems belong to the LORD...
 

This is not a blog that I want you to carry in your mind like a guide to dating 101, this is just something for you to think about. If it speaks to you than I hope you receive it, if not then so be it ;). Not everything is for everybody.  Blog with me!!

#3 Do Not lose yourself in another.....



16 Comments

I Live In A Glass House, But I'm Willing To Share What I know About Relationships

6/12/2012

21 Comments

 
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     Most of the time I don’t like writing about relationships, because I live in a glass house and I don’t want anyone to throw stones. Meaning every relationship has its problems and it seems like couples are happy today and not speaking tomorrow, but I have learned something that I would like to share. You have to pay attention when life is teaching you lessons. Although, relationships are built for two it’s has a lot to do with just YOU, your willingness to keep it going or give up on it completely.

       Everything always seems to go back to “SELF”. You have to make a choice when it comes to your relationship and that choice is, not to expect your mate to be this knight and shining armor, mind reader or dumping ground for how your life isn’t going. Nor should you allow your relationship to make or break your day or your life. Let me expand on my thoughts.

     First you have to remember this, “Every single couple you know has problems”. I don’t care what they tell you, but they do. Relationship problems stem anywhere from cheating to financial issues and when you’re going through it, every problem is equal, we magnify all of them to the 10th power. I'm going to talk about a couple of things life have taught me and by NO means am I saying my relationship is perfect, but I have learned so much and i'm willing to share it. I live life one day at a time and live it like it's Golden.

     Number 1: I have learned to NEVER, EVER, EVER compare my relationship to someone else’s there’s a saying “The reason why we struggle with insecurities is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s HIGHLIGHT REEL. It sounds something like this, Oh My God so and so is so happy, look what he bought her, he take care of all the bills, he always give her a shout out on Facebook, he bought her a brand new car, look at the time he spends with his kids, they go out on date night and the list goes on and on. I’m sorry but NO man want to hear that 24/7 think about if the shoe was on the other foot, you would be so upset that you just may say “Then go ahead and move with so and so” lol. No one like to be compared to another, not unless it's in a positive way. If you want to express your feelings always try to do so in a loving manner or the way you would like to be approached. 

     I’m not telling you to suppress your feelings. I’m just asking you to curb your thoughts and think before you speak. Why are you making comparisons?  A wise women once told me, when you start to argue about him leaving up the toilet seat it’s normally a bigger issue, because you can always put the toilet seat down and if you know you mentioned it over and over, what good is repeating it again while you’re angry. So think about why you’re saying it before you say it and what good would it do to say something now while you’re upset instead of saying it in a loving manner when you've had the opportunity to cool down

    Remember this; people will only show you what they want you to see and that's just fine, who want the world to know about all their problems. I don't! I talk to the Lord and if he can't guide me to the right person to talk to, than why do I need to broadcast it to a bunch of people who just may be in the same situation I'm in. You never know what people are going through so never compare or envy other peoples relationships, because you never know why those flowers are being delivered, it may mean sorry for the drama I put you through or that gift may mean, let me shut her up so I can do what I want this weekend. So be happy with your own life and issues, because if we had the opportunity to put all our problems in pile, you just may take yours back lol.

      I’m not going to hit you over the head with too much info today so I leave you with #1"Never Compare Your Relationship to Someone Else's". Thursday I will share #2  which if we were going in order should of been #1Why It's important to know yourself and make God your foundation. 

    This is not a blog that I want you to carry in your mind like a guide to dating 101, this is just something for you to think about. If it speaks to you than I hope you receive it, if not then so be it ;). Not everything is for everybody.  Blog with me!!

21 Comments

Let Me Teach You How To Treat Me

6/1/2012

10 Comments

 
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   When I came into this world I came by myself and my heavenly father sent me with my destiny already mapped out. He taught me that this is my body and I have to take pride in it, not only pride in what I eat and how I maintain the inside, but also who I let surround me. He taught me to build up my mind with knowledge so I could stand on my own two feet. He left me with his word so I could strengthen and flex my spiritual muscle when needed. You see I’m the daughter of a King and I should be treated so.
   With this being said, it is I who has to teach you how to treat me. No I will not put you before my father, No I will not give up who I am to satisfy you nor will I ask you to do it for me, No I’m not looking for you to save me, because that has been taken care of, No I don’t need you to supply the needs I never received, because I have learned to give them to myself. So all I need from anyone is respect, because if you respect me you will never do anything to DISRESPECT me nor will I be forced to remove you from me.. 

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    Chloe Womack is the name, and I'm living my life like it's GOLDEN. Too bad I can't sing! God has blessed me with a host of other talents to make up for it. I'm an Author, Life Coach, Motivational Speaker, and Radio Host. So why did I decide to write a Blog? Because there are so many other parts of Chloe that I would like to share. Sometimes I just want to take off the work clothes, and makeup and just be me. So here it is, WELCOME TO MY WORLD!

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